Mortality

I'm sitting at home and I have the NFL Network. Not watching, just want some noise in the background. I hear the commentators talk about Sean Taylor being killed, the mall shooting in Omaha, and the constant reminder of senseless violence. My mind starts racing about my own mortality and the legacy in which I'll leave behind.

Right now, I'm only a couple of weeks shy of 34 and there's not much of a heritage. No children yet. And since I am the last male in my bloodline, the Kimmel branch dies out with me. Friends and family with and their memories are all that will keep me immortal. But only for while. Eventually those memories will fade out.

If you ask a person how they would like to die, the most popular answer is probably peacefully in your sleep. No one wakes up in the morning and says, "Today I'll slip down the stairs and break my neck" or "How about I get stabbed in the face this afternoon". On occasions I think about how I will die. I'm hope for the old and peaceful thing, but a car accident seems more accurate.

For me, it's hard to live each day as its your last. I'm wake, go to work, come home and do various things. Certainty it's not living life to its fullest and exploring. I'd love to have my bills paid off, a modest house with conveniences, and enough money just to travel across this fantastic world we live in. But I dont. I live pay check to pay check like so many of us in America (which is better off than many places). Maybe I dont understand the concept of "living life to its fullest". And perhaps until I do comprehend it, I wont find another to share this life with and leave a proper legacy.