it's continuing...

Get a call from the hospital at 9am this morning. They cant do the original test on Grandma because she is experiencing heart palpitations. They put her on meds and are going to give a full body catscan later today. The nurse assured me that every thing is still routine and they would update me if her situation changes.

Talked to Grandma, who doesn't sound like her normal self. I want to head up there but she tells me not to worry. How can I not? Called my sister and told her the change. She is going to head up to the hospital this morning. She'll feel me in later.

Between all of these conversations, I've decided to not to head up there. Going to work tonight and go in the morning. Dont know if its the right decision. If the doctors would actually figure out what's happening, my mind would ease back. My grandma is 82. You're never really ready, but I'm as prepared as you can be for the end. I went through a couple of years of this stuff when my Dad had liver problems. His death . Damn that's been almost eight years ago.

Now I'm jumping the gun a being very pessimistic. Dont know what's wrong.

It will be hard to concentrate tonight.