Luckily my wife and I haven't had too many squabbles in our first year of marriage. And only one that I deemed fairly serious. At least the serious one helped us realize we both need to do work on communication and common ground.
Honestly most of our spats are because of miscommunication and differences in our cultural upbringing. When it happens I don't really know what we are arguing or why she is mad mainly because I view it as nothing to get mad about. Of course that's not really the root of the problem so it takes some detective work to figure it out. Most of time I end up apologizing and we move on.
Tampo is a Filipina way of handling problems and it's a very foreign concept to many Westerners. The woman get angry and wont speak (sometimes not talking for several hours or days) until the issue fades away. The core of the problem is never really discussed but the man and woman both save face.
In my mind it comes off as the woman pouting. I would rather talk about it. How else are we to know what the real issue might be.
My guess is I will always be dealing with tampo in some form or another. At least my wife normally only gives me that familiar angry face to let me I messed up in one form or another and is silent for a minimal amount of time.
Like I said earlier; we are both still learning, growing, and adapting.
Observation of An Illogical mind by Sean Kimmel is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
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